silence speaks loudest

4:23:00 PM


I want to speak my heart's deepest,
But all I have are thoughts,

Yesterday I woke up with the intention of writing three posts that i have wanted to share in a long time;Fast Car about the way we live this life,Journalism 101 on the interviews we get when we are on air and the lack of research on the side of the interviewers and Seizure Mixture about my seizure attacks and my highs and lows with it.On my way out i met my pal and instead of that lovely smile that completes my morning was a grim he had a loss.First thought was to tell him something,anything,everything to console him but deep down i didnt know what to say so i gave him a hug and told him i am there but i know he needed more than that,he needed someone to touch it but my mortality limited me...so i put it as a prayer on my FB update but i was not satisfied until i wrote this piece...Silence speaks loudest at such times.


I want to speak my heart's deepest,
But all i have are thoughts,
In my realm we are one,
You and me,He and she,They and we,
I'm laying down my mentals,
Hoping you can read them somehow.
I have learnt that words and actions dilute,
That the more we say,the less we do;
The more we do,the less we become;
And i just want to be,be me.
Thats why I am using lyrics of songs that seem to capture my insides,
Praying for an osmosis reaction,
That the goosebumps these instruments and soprano crescendo bring will be transmitted,
I am relating to actions of the great,
Being a Leonardo the only one who knows what it is about the Mona Lisa yet sharing,
Hoping it will be understood;
But the more I hope the closer i feel to Ms.Hill
I feel Misunderstood, Mistaken,Miseducated,
Miss...Missing it...
So i am quoting quotes,
Having intercourse with minds of the great,
Building a monument with rooms full of dreams,
Decorated with my achievements,people i know.place I have been to,
For it what you can relate to.
I have no architectural skills so this building might crumble and fall
despite my effort,beside the contents...
But that is the least of my worries for I carry Vachel Lindsay's spirit,
Spending my every 365 scripting Chinese Nightingales,
Knowing she will go on to marry one with well seamed pockets.


I truly want to speak of my heart's desires,
But i lack the language,
So i bear this feeling like a brainworm song on heavy rotation,
This feeling is the illusion that had us wondering how Jesus was human and didnt get the urge,
It's the controversy that would make me a best-seller,
The blasphemy that had The Cannon Law dusted and chunned.
It is an Anthony Hamilton,
Sitting there waiting for me,
Promising to be there to love and protect me,
It has pimped me for life.
But i am Sitawa trying to be a poet, a sister, a human being,
Trying to be a little more,
Reciting Sun 15th hoping to touch another's heart and redeem my soul all with the same stone,
But the stone is so small,
So inaccurately cast,
So face down i fall,
And i want to go back a little more for it was easier,
Wish i preserved the La Gioconda of my heart for yoo already know about poverty,
Poverty in morals,poverty in sharing,poverty in guarding,poverty in beliefs,poverty in communication systems.
But the bat in my hand keeps doing rounds,
It's in Roger Federer's hand, the won that has won 16 grand slam titles and counting,
It has the highest test match run only comparable to India's Sachin Tendulkar waiting to beat the former record,
It is Eve eating the forbidden fruit and feeling generous,
It is Lilith,the complimentary,supplementary,contemporary,
It is all the women in the Temptresses going against evens.

I truly want to speak of my heart's deepest,
But i lack the language,
And all i can use are my thoughts,
In my realm we are one,
You and me,He and she,they and we,
So i keep my lips tightly sealed,
Numb my body so that i take no action,
For silence speaks loudest at such times.

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3 comments

  1. Having intercourse with minds of the great...I love your poems.

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  2. Amazing! I love your use of language — a 'silence' eloquent indeed.

    Eve eating the forbidden fruit and feeling generous
    — delicious. ;)

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  3. hope you are also insync with the latest pieces.

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