For Colored Girls who considered suicide when the rainbow was not enuf author, Poet Ntozake Shange on Mental Health

6:12:00 PM

Movie weekend saw me watch Tyler Perry's version of For Colored Girls. After reading the poetry thanks to a lovely pal, the movie was ok-ish I guess but I think it should have stayed in a theatre hall. The pieces are beyond and I particularly loved the piece done by Juanita Sims played by Loretta Devine someone almost ran off with all of my stuff. Juanita speaks of how she gives herself to Frank yet he does not value her and leaves her over and over and each time he comes back, she takes him back.

She runs a mentor -ship club of sorts at the hospital she works in and tells herself that she has to be strong for her girls, set a good example so the last time Frank walks out and comes back a few days with flowers, she says this amazing piece;
somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff 
not my poems or a dance i gave up in the street
 but somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
like a kleptomaniac workin hard & forgettin while stealin
 this is mine/this aint yr stuff/
now why don’t you put me back & let me hang out in my own self
somebody almost walked off wit alla my stuff 
& didn’t care enuf to send a note home sayin 
i was late for my solo conversation
 or two sizes to small for my own tacky skirts
what can anybody do wit somethin of no value on
a open market/ did you getta dime for my things/
hey man/ where are you goin wid alla my stuff/
to ohh & ahh abt/ daddy/ i gotta mainline number 
from my own shit/ now wontcha put me back/ & let
 me play this duet/ wit silver ring in my nose/
honest to god/
somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/ 
& i didnt bring anythin but the kick & sway of it 
the perfect ass for my man & none of it is theirs 
this is mine/ ntozake ‘her own things’/ that’s my name
 now give me my stuff/ i see ya hidin my laugh/ & how i
s it wif my legs open sometimes/ to give me 
some sunlight/ & there goes my love my toes my chewed 
up finger nails/ niggah/ wif the curls in yr hair/
mr. louisiana hot link/
i want my stuff back/
my rhytums & my voice/ open my mouth/ & let me talk ya 
outta/ throwin my shit in the sewar/ this is some delicate 
leg & whimsical kiss/ i gotta have to give to my choice/
without you runnin off wit alla my shit/
now you cant have me less i give me away/ & i waz
doin all that/ til ya run off on a good thing/
who is this you left me wit/ some simple bitch 
widda bad attitude/ i wants my things/
i want my arm wit the hot iron scar/ & my leg wit the
 flea bite/ i want my calloused feet & quik language back
in my mouth/ fried plantains/ pineapple pear juice/ 
sun-ra & joseph & jules/ i want my own things/ how i lived them/
& give me my memories/ how i waz when i waz there/
you cant have them or do nothin wit them/
stealin my shit from me/ dont make it yrs/ makes it stolen/
somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/ & i waz standin
 there/ lookin at myself/ the whole time 
& it waznt a spirit took my stuff/ waz a man whose 
ego walked round like Rodan’s shadow/ waz a man faster
n my innocence/
waz a lover/ i made too much 
room for/ almost run off wit alla my stuff/
& i didnt know i’d give it up so quik/ & the one runnin wit it/
don’t know he got it/ & i’m shoutin this is mine/ & he dont 
know he got it/ my stuff is the anonymous ripped off treasure
 of the year/
did you know somebody almost got away wit me/
me in a plastic bag under their arm/ me 
danglin on a string of personal carelessness/ i’m spattered wit
 mud & city rain/ & no i didnt get a chance to take a douche/
hey man/ this is not your prerogative/ i gotta have me in my
 pocket/ to get round like a good woman shd/ & make the poem
in the pot or the chicken in the dance/
what i got to do/
i gotta get my stuff to do it to/
why dont ya find yr own things/ & leave this package 
of me for my destiny/ what ya got to get from me/
i’ll give it to ya/ yeh/ i’ll give it to ya/
round 5:00 in the winter/ when the sky is blue-red/
& Dew City is gettin pressed/ if it’s really my stuff/
ya gotta give it to me/ if ya really want it/ i’m 
the only one/ can handle it
-----By: Ntozake Shange.

Mental Illness
I was proked to find out more about the brains behind For colored girls who considered suicide/ when the rainbow wasn't enough; and that is when I met Poet and Playwright Ntozake Shange (Xhosa for she comes with her own things, she who walks like a lion). I have to admit Shange star tracked me with her pieces promoting me to watch the movie and her life story blew me over. She attempted suicide several times and she is not ashamed to talk about it, she has bi-polar and suffers from clinical depression, she suffered a series of strokes and was unable to speak or write and had to undergo rehabilitation, relearning how to speak and write.

Distant Relatives
Growing up I had heard that poets are poeple with issues, a people with funny mannerisms, stranger diseases and it took me a minute to actually say I am a poet, and I love this lady because we are in the same boat, that we are both PMIs, maybe just maybe but no one walks with this earth without issues, what matters is how we deal with it, how we look at our brothers and sisters and love them so much and not want them to go through the same, love them so much irregardless of not having any relation not to have them curse and suffer.

Here she is with her mental health struggles;

You Might Also Like