How did you relate to Rihanna's Man Down? (#sunday15)

10:57:00 AM

As you well know, I marked 8 years as a rape survivor on June 15th, power to me and all the survivors.So I got a prompt about Rihanna's Man Down song which I have to confess I have never really watched beginning to end but had read about blocking and many other stories. This morning, as I was doing my paybacks to all the mail and requisitions that I have been too busy to answer, my mentals reminded me it was on my to do list.I watched it twice and I have it playing in the background as I type this out. I am not sure what those making noise were on about but I know I really related to it from the following angles.

Feelings of Anger, Shame, Guilt
Immediately after she had shot him

Everyone who has been raped will agree with me that once you have kind of dealt with your own feelings, you think of the person who did this to you and all you want is to bring you to your level, that of shame, guilt, anger. This is how the video starts, she kills him in Central Station. Gabrielle Union says that when she got raped, she fired but missed. In my piece, Sunday 15th, I asked for a knife. It is among the first human instincts I would say.

Yesterday morning
Like the end times, no one knows the date and time

Any rape survivor would tell you that when they are still battling with feelings, they will go back to all events that happened before the ordeal. I say if I did not go to buy gum, maybe in the videos case, if the lady did not dance with the man. Note i said maybe for a woman is allowed to go out and dance and know that that is all she wants, a dance. If you read between the lines that do not exist, you need to get checked. This and many theories like this are what make women feel dirty, unworthy, unfit; people will ask what time was it, where were you, how were you dressed. I ask why is it the woman's fault? 

Lead on
Let the excuse be anything other than because she is a girl

Why can the man be easily seduced? Why is it in a man's nature to want to be instead your short skirt or tight pants? Why should we sit back and accept this 'norms' and bash women every time they want to feel sexy for sexiness sake?

What about grandmothers and babies who get raped? What lead ons do they bring on? I was raped on a Sunday morning over a cup of tea? Show me my ill? It is all in twisted minds which we as society encourage by saying they were made like that, that is how things are. By trying so hard to change so as not to provoke them, who are they for us to change for them? 

The greatest cowardice
The greatest form of cowardice

I have no word for this scene, my heart bleeds greatly when i see it but thinking that I am on my 8th year, helping loads of girls it does not hurt as much, though it still hurts. Are you a rape survivor, I would like to know what the different scenes in the video meant to you.I applaud Rihanna for this tune, she killed a man in Central Station, other let that man kill there dignity and worth to be someone, I speak out and hope to heal as many not to fall on either side of the fence. 

I leave all my people in the struggle one of my best lines from Desiderata;
You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. 

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  1. this track, it touches me deeply. in a way it makes me feel bad, because she fights back, she takes his life in exchange for her dignity, i never fought back. i was only 13, too weak maybe, or just afraid, i dont know. all i remember is saying yes because i couldnt say no.she rushes home and gets her gun,makes up her mind to shoot the guy. my first instinct was to get cleaned up, wash the dirt and blood off myself and never tell anyone that the man who raped me worked for my dad, a tout. am not one to discriminate but i imagine he felt really good about himself, having a girl of my social class.i was too ashamed of myself. i replayed the events of that day over and over and each time i found myself at fault, if only i hadnt done this or the other. seven years down the line, am not doing too bad.i imagine that how his life deteriorated to the point of alcoholism and eventual death somehow avenged for what he did to me.